He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize