I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him