they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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