she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Houston, we have a blender
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Someone came in the potted fern
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
