Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
nutella sex= disaster
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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