i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
