it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
