Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
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all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
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No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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