I am in a vortex of obligation.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
