she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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