Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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