Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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