Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
MIDGETS
????
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
