i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize
