grandma shit on top of the toilet
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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