just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...