Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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