I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
