Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
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