But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Randomize
