idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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