The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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