pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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