I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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