What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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