No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize