Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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