I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
third nipple confirmed
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
