Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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