it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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