You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
