i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
