hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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