In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Let's paint friendship bongs
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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