ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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