oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
