Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
