but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
