I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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