put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
