I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
