yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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