Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
