afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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