Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
