can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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