I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Someone signed my nipple.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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