Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
