I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
