You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize